Day 21

Regret

Today marks week 3 of starting Jenny Craig. While I have not gained any weight from my last weigh-in, I have not lost any either. If I had stayed on track, I'm positive I would of lost 15lbs by now. But as the saying goes, "shoudda, couldda & wouldda don't count".

Understandably, family crisis will flip any one's life upside down. But is this what I should expect when I deviate even the slightest bit from routine? Could I have stayed on my J.C plan during this tumultuous time? I mean, I did wake up in a house with an oven, and go to sleep in a house with an oven....It just wasn't MY house. Do I look for any excuse to jump off the program? I really don't have the answers to those questions right now. Who know how deep the reasons for any of our behaviors lie. Who know, maybe the fear of success is too much. Maybe somewhere deep down inside, I'm afraid of succeeding because I can't handle the newfound attention it will bring to my life.... WHO KNOWS.... It just seems that EVERY SINGLE TIME I get to this point, something always happens that throws me right off course. Whether it's in my control or not, something always happens that give way for me to relapse into my usual nonsense.

The only thing that I am sure about is this: I'm supper ready to get back on track. I called J.C. and scheduled an appointment for New Year's Eve at 1pm. I was trying to get a jump start on the all the"New Year's Resolutioners" that will be crowding our gyms and J.C centers for the month of January...but I guess I'll one of them now.

If ya can't beat em, join em!