Day 1

Today marks the first day of the rest of my life. I decided to join Jenny Craig (as a cringe while I type those two words...."Jenny" and "Craig"...ugh) because I wanted to do something about, well....to do something about everything. Years of therapy probably won't be able to explain why I am so consumed with weight... really, my weight.

Let's start with the particulars of the situation. I'm overweight. Real simple...I'm not going to go into how much I actually weigh. Let's just say I could stand to lose a good 50 pounds, and not look emaciated. How's that?

Making it through the first day really is the hardest part of this whole journey. It's a shock to the system that I don't think anyone is really ready for, until of course you actually just do it. To be completely honest, it wasn't that bad. I had my 3 crazy J.C. meals, some salad, an official JC approved snack, and enough water to flush out the fuel line of my father's Ford Expedition. How do I feel, you may be asking yourself (or not... you could be asking yourself how the fuck you got stuck on this blog...)? I feel pretty good. I have to say, the physicality of being addicted to food no way compares to the mental addiction of thinking you need food to make you happy. Last night I had about 2000 calories in my dinner by itself (come on now...those of you chronic dieters out there refer to this as the "last meal"). Today I had about 1400 calories all day. After consuming those 1400 calories, I really feel that it was sufficient enough to keep my tummy full and my mental appetite, content.

J.C. has its "pros" and "cons". The obvious "pro" is all the food games (thinking, cooking, measuring, weighing) is completely eliminated. Heat & Eat....end of story. The "con" is, you are a slave to the freezer. If you really want this plan to work, especially in the first few weeks, don't even think about going out to dinner. Once you get tantalized by the food prepared in restaurant kitchens (probably with 5 times the amount of butter, salt and grease that fat asses like us need to avoid), it makes it verrrrry hard to want to go back to eating out of a cardboard box. So my advice is, suck it up fatties. Make that sacrifice for yourself until you are ready to learn how to eat out with some sort of self control. God know I don't have any.....(yet).

So for a lil' visual motivation, I've added 2 pics of what we want to look like, and 2 pics of what we don't want to look like. If you even remotely look like the 2 latter pics, you should really just kill yourself unless you are ready to do something about it. If you even remotely look like the first 2, well...kill yourself just because.

Onward and upward skanks.....let's take this journey together.